I said what?

Oct 11, 2019

My son always knows how to cheer me up!

Yesterday we had to run down to the local library to return a few things. Well, he was talking, I wasn’t paying much attention til he said, “I slapped a unicorn with a shovel.” Hold the popcorn! What did he just say? I asked him to repeat what he had just said!

Apparently, he had had a dream… he was standing in a field and there was a unicorn. For some reason, he slapped it with a shovel and knocked the corn off…now it’s a zero-corn!! LOL!!! That sure did brighten my day! (he also said he felt kinda bad for knocking his cone off!)

Did you know that the cone on a unicorn’s head is called a magical horn? Just looked it up!

So that got me to thinking…a dangerous sport for me, but hey, I’ve survived so far!! What other silliness has popped out of our mouths?

“I just shaved my tongue!” – HCMorris

Yup, I said that! We were pulling out from the family reunion, I was in the very back row of the Pontiac Montana and had my feet propped up on the seat in front of me. “I just shaved my legs.” is what I meant to say, but “I just shaved my tongue” is what came out! Everyone laughed, including my dad! Well, my son didn’t…he either didn’t hear me or didn’t understand. Anyway, I didn’t think everyone heard me, but apparently they did. I never lived it down!! My mom used to say “Did you forget to put your eye teeth in?” (So you can see what your saying?)

“I need a knife” I said in my sleep.

“What for?” My dad asked.

“So I can butter some bread.”

This is what my dad told me I said when I had fallen asleep on the couch one night.

Another night, my dad tried to get me up (again I had fallen asleep on the couch) to go to bed. “I’m eating green ice cream.” I told him…I can see him walking away, chuckling, while shaking his head.

I know there’s some other stuff that’s come out of my mouth, and if either of my parents were around, I’d ask them. I can’t think of anything else, so…

Here’s some sayings from other people…

…overheard at work…

  • “Would you rather be a bath or a toilet?”
  • “Babies aren’t just for Christmas, you know.”
  • “Can you show me how to open this banana?”
  • “Swans are just female geese though, right?”

…while they were sleeping…

My mum, after falling asleep on the couch: “We’ll need to find a replacement…”

Me: “for what?”

Mum: “Your sister” —Reddit user frankiedarlin


My wife told me last month that while I was sleeping I said, “Set the burrito trap.”

She said she asked me what that was… I have no clue, but would like to know myself. —porkfatrules


I said to my fiancé in my sleep: “I love you because you have such long antennae.” —YodaPie.

Hope you had a good laugh and are having a wonderful day!

Thanks for stopping by!!

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